I met my shadows…and they crowned me whole.

A  personal journey through light, shadow, and rebirth in the life of a spiritual counselor.

Several times I pause to ponder about what I do for a living… it still blows my mind.

 I teach people how to sail the waters of life. No, I am not a life coach who teaches you how to polish your life on a surface level…I am a Spiritual Counselor. You can see me as a multidimensional teacher who focuses on “ how to evolve at a soul level as a human in planet Earth”

I guide you in both planes… physical and non physical, for a complete transformation. 

The Awakening

The first six years after my spiritual awakening were beyond magical.

They were the ignition that allowed me to take the leap of faith into who I am today.

The awakening itself began in pain — my brother nearly dying — but what followed was pure delight. My life felt like a dream.

I moved to Costa Rica, made beautiful friendships, and taught yoga by the sea. My days were filled with light, laughter, and flow. Little did human Fabiola know… the next phase of transformation was about to begin.

Enough about light — it was time to explore the shadows.

The Descent

The beginning of my dark night of the soul.

Suddenly, 99% of my friendships no longer felt enjoyable. The town I once loved started to feel toxic and limiting. I felt an inner knowing that something else was calling me — that it was time for a deeper initiation.

So, without hesitation, I leaped again into the arms of life, which I had seen as my best friend… and moved to another beach town.

If anyone from the outside would have looked into my life, they would just see a woman remaining positive and non stop working towards her best life, they would've also said that my life was pretty amazing, after all I live next to the Costa Rican sea, I am my own boss, happily single, I do what I love for a living, I am healthy, intelligent and pretty sexy if I may add… ;) 

All jokes aside… eventhou my external reality seemed like heaven, my internal reality was beginning to turn into hell day by day. My personal life started to feel like a labyrinth with no exit… none of my personal plans or wishes came to fruition. When I say none I mean NONE! 

Later, I would understand: their fulfillment would have stopped me from learning the deeper lessons I was meant to master first.

The Dark Night of the Soul

My relationship with life started to distort.. I no longer saw life as my “best friend” I now saw it as my punisher.

It wasn’t just that things weren’t working out. I began to feel emotions that didn't match my life situations.  I cried endlessly, sensing waves of  deep pain and confusion that seemed to come from nowhere.

I thought I was losing my mind. I was friendless, jobless, believing I was loosing my mind, and didn't even have God to count on, because God also went quiet. 

And as I doubted myself, I attracted a circle of deeply unconscious, toxic people — mirrors of the chaos within me.

Mornings by the ocean became rituals of tears. Crying  by the sea shore surrounded by the beautiful rising sunlight turning everything it touched into a brighter richer shade …except me it seemed. I would see the unexplainable beauty of the crashing waves, breathe in the ocean mist, see the giant white clouds reflecting the orange sun back to me… I was surrounded by literal heaven, but me…I was in my personal hell, and it was burning hot and wild. 

The experiences I went through during that time, got me to the point of believing I was in a cruel experiment conducted by a higher power… I doubted every decision I had ever made, I doubted spirituality, the universal laws,  I lost my faith in myself, I questioned my profession.

I “broke up” with the Universe and Spirituality several times.

I wished  so hard I could go back to “normal”, to one day wake up and be plugged back into the matrix and live an average life, unaware of so much pain and depth. I was tired of seeing and feeling SO MUCH, NON STOP  in a blinded toxic world. 

But no matter how hard or how many times I did that.. A quiet ancient internal force would start in me, forcing me to continue to try, to dream…this internal force saved me more than once, and I would hate it each time. 

 I would hate the aspect of me that didn't let me give up, the one who always offered a higher perspective, the one who held me while I was about done existing in this physical realm.

Every time I thought I had reached rock bottom, the floor gave way again. Ego death after ego death, until there was nothing left of the “me” I once knew.

The Understanding

Eventually, after about three and a half or four  years, the fog began to lift slightly. 

I understood that these emotions, these heavy experiences, were not punishments.

They were teachers, very valuable…priceless teachers. 

They were there so I could understand pain at a collective level — so that I could be the best at what I came here to do.

I had already met God.

It was time to meet the Devil.

Both are vital, valid forces in this dualistic reality.

I stopped labeling my darkness as a mistake from the universe and from my past actions,  and began to accept it. I let the waves crash, and I learned to surf them, and yes it was scary and painful as hell. 

Years of processing, feeling, and releasing transformed me into someone new.

Now, I can proudly say — I am great at sailing all types of currents.

The Rebirth

Life finally feels soft again.

I find myself singing in the mornings, feeling the emotions that once abandoned me. My life is beginning to take a new, beautiful form — shaped by this new version of me.

I come out of my five-year-long dark night of the soul seeing the benefit in every tear, every collapse, every lesson.

I am now better equipped to be of service.

I know despair. I know grief. I know powerlessness and all other ugly cousins of the emotional spectrum — and I also know how to love them back into unity.

In a world that is now going through its own collective dark night of the soul, it all makes sense. I needed to experience my own so I could guide others through theirs.

Why I’m Here

I am now good friends with despair, with hate, with powerlessness. I understand where they come from and why they exist, and most importantly I now know how to love them back into unity. I now know how to help YOU and your loved ones…through the most difficult times, because let's face it.. difficult times are here and we have a while to go, so why not start learning how to survive and better difficult times. 

I guide you into healing past trauma from the root, as well as into changing into preferred timelines. I teach you about emotions, their meanings and how to bring your emotional body back into alignment, not by bulldozing parts of you, like the popular self help industry teaches us to, not by talking endlessly, like regular western therapy, not by using hallucinogenic substances… I help you by showing you your innate power, the power of your intention and awareness.  

So when you’re ready, I’ll be here. To help you remember that even in the darkest night,

you were never lost —

you were learning how to build constellations out of it.

When you are ready, find me in Junquillal, teaching beach yoga, offering Reiki sessions, art therapy, meditation, Inner Healing and Spiritual Counseling.